It's Still Alive!

it was even waving at us

;-)

still grasshopping, still growing, still heartbeating.

later today : now that some tension is gone I'm getting so tired.... will be a good night of sleep I hope.
What can I still remember from the scan.
- the head was measured, and found ok for 14w3d
- the placenta seemed very big thick and woolly
- there were soooo many tiny vertebrae
- we could see a little arm waving with the smallest left hand I have ever seen. The image was frozen for me so I could count to 5 and they were all there.

We asked if she could see if it was a boy or  girl yet, and she tried, even got a view of two legs but with the fuzz there was nothing obvious. (So now I'm reassured that the little one doesn't have a very large penis, we would have seen it then and it would have been slightly freaky)

After the scan, the midwife went through some questions, probably all standard stuff, but quite alien to me. Had we arranged 'kraamzorg' already (maternity care? postnatal care?)
erhm, no, I was most interested in finding out if the grasshopper was still alive.
Was I planning on breastfeeding? what? why are they even asking? this year I plan on feeding little one through the umbilical cord me thinks.
I explained I was not quite over the shock of one twin trying to vanish. (it is still visible, still in a little sac) Then she said she understood, and made a note in my file so I can come in any time to listen to the heartbeat to reassure the survivor is still hanging on. Very kind and thoughtful (almost un-dutch to let someone come in without medical necessity)

Oh , and I'm allowed to exercise again, with moderation. Yay for stress release! and better fitness might come in handy next year.

I find I'm getting emotional. Not sure if it is the change in hormones, today i can stop taking my superdose of progesterone and will remove estrogen patches shortly, so don't know if the net effect will be more or less hormones.
Thinking of all your little ones that I know of that vanished and getting a bit sad again. Wishing you will soon be at least as lucky as I seem to be now. While some questions freak me out, none of them are as hard to answer as the ' and now what' of IF.
hugs