Giving blood, I did it again.
26 months ago was the last time it worked. At the next occasion, failing the Hb test, I decided together with the donation doctor I would take a break and focus on getting pregnant. The system would call for me again after so many months had past.
I knew I had to fill out their questionnaire with those two small questions. Have you been pregnant and Are you pregnant now. This was the first time I had to answer yes/no instead of no/maybe. And I feel only 1% melancholic about that. And 98% proud that my healthy body does help other people who are not so fortunate. That leaves 1% sadness over the fact that 3 years and two months ago my cousin might have been saved by one more transfusion. He was only 31, but no matter how healthy and young he was, life with a ruptured liver that started to bleed as soon as he was out of hospital in his own bed didn't last 6 weeks.
Should have known that typing this does reawaken that sad sad time.
It's weird to compare missing a family member I was so close with, with missing my non existent child.
And then... email... colleagues from my past job looking for people for a big project at DP's company. The company is still deciding which party to hire, and depending on that answer I might have a chance to jump on board. And maybe start real soon, tomorrow for all they care!
Wow, how exciting.
The human mind keeps amazing me. Minutes ago I was sniffing away some tears, now I can hardly sit still to type this. It would be nice to work at the same office as DP again. We could bike to work on my supercool tandem. Spring is in the air...
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Yay for you! Spring is in the air indeed :)
ReplyDeleteGood for you for donating blood, even if it is bittersweet re: the pregnancy questions. I have donated in the past and must get myself in to do it again.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the job!
I congratulate you on donating blood. I used to (before all the pregnant/not pregnant/pregnant/not pregnant nonsense) and I often feel vaguely bad that I'm not at the moment. Good to know someone else is making up for me!
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry about your cousin. Many hugs.
Only 31. That is so young. Very very sad. How heart-breaking for you.
ReplyDeleteA tandem! How fab! My friend and her husband have one, he is incredibly fit and propels them along speedily. Cool!
(Once again with the lost days. Presumably strolling smugly around Amsterdam, eh?)
Just hopped over from May's blog. I'm impressed that you're up for giving blood after all of the labwork/blood tests in the past year.
ReplyDeleteIt's nice to find another infertility blog from the Netherlands. I didn't do my cycles here, but am definitely considering it.